10 Leadership Lessons: Part 1

Own your story: Why your biggest career obstacle may be you.

This is part 1 of my series, sharing the top 10 leadership lessons I've learned over the past 30 years. Read last week’s intro post here: Building a Bridge

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Listen to this post:

The room went silent. Dead silent.

I'd just ambushed a leader (I’ll call him Jerry) with performance data about his team. In front of his peers. Without warning. To say he wasn’t happy is an understatement. Jerry turned red and began questioning whether my report was even accurate.

I thought I was being thorough by presenting the facts (I am a high “C” on the DISC profile). What I'd really done was potentially sabotage a relationship because I didn’t realize the importance of giving him a heads up. I was more worried that asking questions would make me look like an amateur.

This leads into our first lesson.

Lesson #1: Ask questions

Early in my career, I believed that asking questions was a sign of weakness. Successful people just knew things, right? So I'd nod along in meetings, afraid to talk and reveal what I didn't understand.

Blindsiding Jerry in that meeting was a wake-up call. I don’t blame him for being upset. I hadn’t given him a chance to take in the information, add his perspective, and potentially improve my presentation. I'd been so focused on impressing my boss that I had missed this crucial step.

I realized that not knowing everything is a superpower. Not only will you avoid making the mistake I made, but you will also have the opportunity to let your voice be heard in meetings. You will build influence more quickly. You will get more comfortable not knowing all the answers.

You can bet that every meeting I’ve had since then, I circle up with stakeholders to ensure they’ve a chance to react privately and are never surprised in a group meeting.

The meeting before the meeting matters! (We could do an entire series on this topic!)

Lesson #2: Commit to results, not effort

Fresh out of school, I thought showing up early and staying late would help me get noticed in my first job. I would grind through my to-do list each day. I thought it was a badge of honor when my boss would tell me to have a good night as he headed for home before I did

I was busy. I was dedicated. I was also unaware of what truly advances a career.

I noticed that others were being promoted ahead of me. They seemed to have some quality that I didn’t have. Didn’t my boss see my dedication to getting things done? Didn’t he notice how I would fly out on Sunday to save the company money? This pattern continued for far too long.

A shift happened for me when I took a job at a new company. My boss challenged me to consider the outcome I wanted to achieve and ask myself, was the work I was engaged in actually moving the needle toward that outcome, or was I just trying to feel productive?

I worked fewer hours but achieved more impact. I focused on measuring the results of my work and became skilled in communicating those results to my stakeholders to make sure we were aligned.

Activity is easy to measure. Taking responsibility for an outcome is hard, but it’s worth it.

Leadership Lesson #3: Be quick to say, "It's my fault."

Cleveland, Ohio. The 1990s. I'm testing cutting-edge technology: faxing bills of lading via scanners, laptops, and cell phones from truck cabs. Go ahead, roll your eyes, but this was Star Wars for its time (Gen Z, ask your parents about bag phones).

The problem? Early cell phone technology, combined with less-than-ideal delivery truck environments, results in constant failures. Sam, the local branch manager, watched as his drivers' productivity cratered while they struggled with equipment that worked about half the time.

The Motorola Bag Phone: The iPhone was 20 years away!

Sam’s frustration mounted. So did mine. But instead of owning the problem, I deflected: "My boss is pushing this project. Take it up with him."

Needless to say, this approach was not popular in Browns country.

Everything changed when I stopped defending and started listening to Sam. Diving productivity numbers, driver frustration, and pressure from his boss. Once I owned my part in creating that pressure, we could work together on solutions.

I compiled the results and made the case to my boss as to why this tech wasn’t ready for prime time.

Was I the only one to blame for the project's outcome? No.

Did acknowledging my part in it make a difference? Absolutely.

When you own a problem, people are more willing to work with you to solve it. When you pass the buck, they will work against you.

Summing up Lessons 1 - 3

Owning your story means getting honest about where you're falling short:

1. What do my stakeholders actually care about? When was the last time I asked them?

2. Am I measuring myself by my effort or outcomes?

3. When a project goes south, do I look for an excuse or ways to fix it?

Your career, and more importantly, your life, is made up of small choices. Every project is an opportunity to take ownership of the outcome. Every mistake is an opportunity to show who you really are when things go wrong.

What leadership lessons have you learned that you could share with The Authentic Path community?

Next week: Leadership Lessons #4 and #5 - "Serve Without Scorekeeping." Why serving others is the path to success in your career, and most importantly, your life.

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