Climbing to Nowhere

Trade your finish line for a life that matters

My trusty stepladder

Listen here

Go grab your step ladder from the garage. I'll wait.

Mine has 5 steps. At the very top, there's a blue platform with a warning that caught my eye.

NOT A STEP

Sure, the Werner company doesn't want you to stand up there and end up in the ER. But looking at those three words, I realized they were telling me something much deeper about my own life.

Last week, I congratulated John on a big win at work. His response was not what I expected. He replied, "Just 2 more years of this and I can retire."

I felt sad for him. Not because retirement is bad, but because he seems to be trudging through life, waiting for some arrival point. I know that feeling. I lived it for decades.

For most of my life, I climbed like there was somewhere to get to. Graduate high school to get to college. Finish college to get a job. Get married. Have kids. Get promoted to get the title. Get the title to get... what exactly?

The Question That Changed Everything

A couple of years after my brain surgery, I was listening to a podcast. The guest said something that stayed with me: "The quality of the questions we ask ourselves determines the quality of the life we end up living."

I soon realized I'd spent 40 years and never asked myself real questions about the life I wanted to live. I was too busy climbing, assuming the ladder was leaned up against the right wall.

You know what's crazy? Once I started asking better questions, I discovered something that Earl Nightingale knew all along:

"Success is the progressive realization of a worthy goal."

Read that again. Success isn't the goal itself. It's not the arrival. It's the progressive realization: the daily pursuit, the becoming, the growth.

There Is No Top Step

Here's what I've learned: The moment we think we've arrived is the moment our lives stop having meaning.

Think about it. What happens when you "make it"? When you finally get the promotion, the house, the boat, the car, and then the retirement? If that's your finish line, then what? Sit on the front porch and ride it out? Count down days like John?

These days, I feel most alive when I'm coaching leaders and young professionals. Every conversation is an opportunity to ask better questions, to listen more deeply, and to help someone see what they could become. When my attitude goes south (and it does), I can turn it around by speaking life into someone else.

That's my worthy goal: getting better at serving others, one conversation at a time. I’ll never get a certificate that says "Congratulations, you're now a perfect coach." Thank God for that.

It’s the pursuit itself that makes me feel alive.

Time to Get a New Ladder

Let me be clear. I applaud your efforts to improve yourself and continue growing in your work and life. Don’t stop. But I do have a question for you: What are you hoping to find at the top of the ladder you are climbing?

If your answer sounds something like
"Then I'll finally be happy."
"Then I can finally rest."
"Then I'll have made it."

You may be climbing nowhere, my friend.

Instead, try this:

1. Ask yourself a better question: Not "When will I arrive?" but "What worthy pursuit makes me come alive?" Write it down. Right now. Look at it every day.

2. Find your daily pursuit: What could you get progressively better at that would energize you rather than drain you? For me, it's coaching. For you, it might be creating, teaching, building, connecting, mentoring: something that has no ceiling.

3. Celebrate the climb¹: Stop trying to get to that top step that isn’t a step. Find joy in Tuesday's small improvement over Monday. That IS success.

Look, apparently, John’s planning to retire in two years, whether he's miserable or not.

But you? You get to choose. You can keep climbing toward some imaginary step, or you can realize that climbing toward a worthy goal is the whole point.

Your ladder doesn't end. Sometimes you need to switch the wall it’s leaned up against. But you never stop climbing toward something that matters to you.

There is no arrival. There's just you, becoming better than you were yesterday, in pursuit of YOUR worthy goal.

Now that's a life worth living.

What worthy goal are you pursuing that has no finish line? Hit reply and tell me. I read every single email.

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1. Admit it, you’re tempted to start singing along with Miley Cyrus.