Freedom Is One Decision Away

You hold the key

It's not an easy journey, to get to a place where you forgive people.
But it is such a powerful place, because it frees you.”
-Tyler Perry

I was headed back to work after lunch, trying to merge onto the interstate. As I sped up, the car next to me wouldn’t let me in. The merge lane was ending fast, and there was a big dump truck ahead of me. What the heck! I felt the anger rising up in my chest. I was going almost 80 mph trying to get over, but this fool wouldn’t let me in! I ended up whipping in front of him to avoid going off-road in the median.

So what did I do? I rolled down my window and gave him…a thumbs-up! To my surprise, he raised a different appendage to indicate that I was #1! As I calmed down and my heart stopped racing, I realized how mad I was at this guy I’d never met. Did I want to be run off the highway? Nope. But is it worth being upset for days on end?

Each of us has someone who has hurt us - a stranger, friend, family member, or coworker. You can recall the exact situation: where you were, how that person made you feel, and how you decided you would never forgive them.

If this has never happened to you, you are a better person than me. I remember sleepless nights lying on the couch with situations playing over and over in my head. I rehearsed what I should have said in the moment, to really tell them how I felt and how much they hurt me. We carry these hurts others put on us around in our bodies for days, weeks, months even years on end.

This topic made me think of a Don Henley song I’ve always loved. He is one of the great solo artists of our time. When this song comes on, I always listen to the end. The last verse goes like this:

There are people in your life
Who've come and gone
They let you down
You know they hurt your pride
You better put it all behind you, baby
Cause life goes on
You keep carryin' that anger
It'll eat you up inside, baby

Who do you need to forgive today to release yourself from a prison of your own making? Do they deserve to be forgiven? Probably not. However, what kind of price are you paying for holding this grudge? You hold the key to opening the door to the prison you’ve created for yourself. It’s time to stop living in the past and walk out into the light of a bright future.¹

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1. For deep hurt, counseling is so helpful.