Seek First to Understand
It can change your perspective on how you see others and the world around you
Dr. John Imhoff1 founded the Industrial Engineering department at the University of Arkansas where I attended school. I had the privilege of having him for more than one class. Many of us have fond memories of “Dr. I" as he had a deep passion for mentoring students. He was focused on adding value to us through his many years of experience. Dr. Imhoff repeated phrases that stuck in your head. One that I'll never forget was a paraphrase of Proverbs 4:7: “With all thy getting get understanding." This has come to my mind more than once as I've made the mistake of assuming the intent of others without seeking first to understand where they are coming from.
“With all thy getting, get understanding” Proverbs 4:7
We tell ourselves stories about what a person’s motives are based on a single interaction, text, email, or a social media post. This is especially true when you think about one generation judging another. What if instead of making assumptions, we sought first to understand? What if generational differences became a strength rather than something to endure?
I recently read a book called “A New Kind of Diversity.”2 The author does a great job of explaining the forces that shaped each generation. It also gives you a better appreciation for the strengths and opportunities each has. At our company, this book spawned a multi-generational book club in which Gen X, Millenials, and Gen Z are all learning from each other. It’s been powerful to see how understanding can change perspectives.
I encourage you to seek understanding with those you encounter this week. Ask open-ended questions. Listen to the answers. Repeat back what you heard. Course correct as needed. I’m thankful for Dr. Imhoff’s investment in my life and I’m hopeful to follow his example in impacting others for as long as I have the opportunity.
You can’t change everything that’s wrong with the world, but you can change the world around you. Grow yourself first so you can serve others well. Have an outstanding week!
Tarek this reminds me to be mindful of watching my tongue when dealing with adult children. Plus discerning whether to be empathetic or sympathetic without trying to control or “fix” the problem. Thank you for these inspirational blogs.