Listen here
I love Sunday mornings. They're my absolute favorite. We go to church on Saturday nights, which means Sundays are wide open with possibilities.
But here's the thing: I'm terrible at relaxing, even on weekends. Ask Susanna. She'll tell you. Most mornings, I'm up early writing this newsletter or chipping away at my book. And you know what? Sunday mornings feel life-giving to me.
Except when they don't.
You know those mornings. I grab my phone to check "just one thing." Twenty minutes later, I'm doom-scrolling through Instagram, watching some guy humble-brag about his morning routine that started at 4:00am with 1000 burpees and 10,000 grams of protein. All of a sudden, I feel like a slug. My shoulders are tight. That creative spark I woke up with? Gone. Just like that. Like it never existed.
Tell me I’m not the only one this has happened to.
Here's what kills me: we check our phones 205 times a day. TWO HUNDRED AND FIVE.1 That's once every 5 minutes, we're basically saying, "Hey brain, please interrupt whatever important thing I was thinking about." We're training ourselves to be distracted. It's like we're Pavlov's dogs, except the bell is a notification sound, and instead of food, we get increased anxiety for being reminded of all the ways we don’t measure up.
John Maxwell is right. What you focus on really does expand. And most of us are focused on things that take away life instead of giving it back.
This got me thinking of the 3 Buckets of Influence and how they affect our lives:
1. People
That friend who texts to check how you're really doing (🔥 Fuel)
Your coworker sitting by you who complains. All day. (💧 Drain)
2. Media
That biography you read that makes you think "if they can do it..." (🔥 Fuel)
Alerts at 6am about wars, politics, and other things you can't control. (💧 Drain)
3. Habits
A morning walk where you actually hear birds and see running water. (🔥 Fuel)
Phone in hand before feet hit floor (💧 Drain)
Last Sunday I tried something. Instead of scrolling through family travel team softball pictures, I left my phone on the kitchen counter and walked out the door. Three miles around a small lake near our house. No podcasts. No music.
Just me and my thoughts.
You know what happened? I had a breakthrough idea for my book! I kept repeating the idea out loud until I made it back home to write it down.
If you've been feeling scattered lately, maybe you're not broken. Maybe you have too many drains in your life.
OK, now it’s your turn.
Try this for one today:
Write down your top 5 inputs from the last seven days. Be honest.
Label each one:
🔥 Fuel = makes you feel more like yourself
💧 Drain = leaves you anxious or numb
Now replace one drain with fuel instead. Just one. Give yourself grace not to transform in one day.
But also ask yourself this: What's that one input you know is toxic, but you keep going back to?
Look, I get it. That phone is designed to be irresistible. Some brilliant engineers are paid well to make you want to pick it up just one more time.
But here's what I know: every morning you get to choose. Even if you wake up grumpy. Even if you had weird dreams about showing up late for Ms. Creighton’s English test in your underwear (so hard to get over that one).
Don’t watch other people live their lives while yours slips by.
You get to choose.
Your phone will still be there after your walk. The scroll can wait. But that idea that's been trying to get your attention?
That dream you keep putting off? Don’t let the clock run out on that one.
You only get one life.
You were born to do something great with your life.
Today is the day to start.
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Strolling instead of scrolling...yes!